wandering thoughts

Maya Angelou once said, "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."..............

I find this quote very interesting and true. Recently, I was contacted by a soon-to-be mother. She is 3 years younger than me, but was desperate for advice and information. She just found out that she and her husband are both CF gene carriers, so her child has a 25% chance of having CF. The woman was overwhelmed, terrified, and a bit lost. She knew nothing of the disease or what problems it could cause for her son and her family as a whole. Completely feeling for her mindset and situation, I couldn't help but write her back. We messaged back and forth several times, she had various questions. The thing is that when I was younger, I was so closed off about my disease. I never wanted to discuss it with anyone, just to ignore it really. But then I had quite the wake up call. It was a terrifying experience that changed me forever, but I truly needed to be slapped in the face.Things are different now. I am older, wiser (yes), but have also had more life experience. My life has taught me that it doesn't do anyone service or any good to keep my health challenges to myself. Instead, if I can reach out to people, speak out, and get involved it is somehow as therapeutic for me as it is helpful and reassuring for them.

Anyway, back to this woman. The things that I shared with her really seemed to help her. She was so appreciative and touched that I had taken the time to write a complete stranger. It made me feel incredible. I have not felt that happy since I had my baby boy 10 months ago. I guess, in part, I did it for selfish reasons. All those years, up until I was 18 or 19, I spent not taking care of myself, denying my situation, and causing my family grief. I never spoke to or reached out to anyone. I mean why would I help other people if I didn't even care enough to help myself. So I suppose I feel like in some way for me to help as many people as I can now and raise awareness and funding for a cure.....I am somehow making up for the past.

The communication that I had with this woman, Lisa, was so fulfilling. I mean I have felt the contentment and happiness of being a mom, wife, sister, etc. Those experiences are all amazing and rewarding in their own way. But this was different. This was me giving this scared, pregnant woman information and HOPE. I want to do this more........if what I go through in my life and the challenges I have come across and overcome , if that can be of help to other people in similar siutations. Then I think besides being Kason and Brandon's mom, I have found my calling :).